It’s that time of the year again. Couples gifting each other favorite things, going out of their ways to make each other happy. The restaurants offer the special Valentine’s Day menu. Activists go around opposing the celebration of the day. It’s a circus. It’s either a beautiful one or something beyond worse. It all depends on how we look at the day.
As for me, I am not much of an admirer of the day. I would be among the people who would hold a black heart party that day. In my opinion, love doesn’t stay the same, to put it clearly, the person who loves changes. The couples to whom being in a relation is new, the day might be exciting. But for those, who have been in a relation for a long time, it might not be that interesting. I know, what you are thinking right now. You are thinking about your parents who have been in love for so long. Are they really in love? or Are they making a choice each day? The person making the choice changes so does the love. There is one thing that’s stuck in my head though. We love our parents and siblings no matter what. Is that a choice too? Or Is it a feeling that just doesn’t change?
I am an atheist when it comes to love between a man and a woman. Love between us changes because it involves the hormones. Hormones, you know, they are amazing little things which let us feel. We would just be machines without it. But, the real question is, Is love boon or a bane?
Till now, I thought it’s a bane because I hate the feeling of my heart being played and being crushed. I hate to think that someone has control over my heart. Since love is just a choice I have decided not to love anyone. But the universe decided otherwise, I met someone. With him, I can’t help but fall in love. I pride myself having known everything about love so the universe decided to give me a lesson. I tried so hard to stop myself from liking him, loving him, adoring him for what he is, but it’s so tiring to not love him. Every day, I am battling the thought that I am in love. I might continue to do the same, battle it for the rest of my life. But for a few minutes, I want to take a break from the battle and admit that I love him.
These few minutes I am going to let my thoughts out. Loving him might be the best thing that would happen to me in this world. I love him to the point that I don’t care even if he is in love with someone else. Never once in my life I thought that I would desire someone so much that just a smile from him would lighten my day.
He will probably never come to know that I love him because he says he is so in love with someone else. He will never know how my heart craves for him each second and how my mind constantly denies it. It’s so tiring, even though it’s tiring, I will love him. He reminds me of a song, which goes like this
He says he is so in love
He’s finally got it right
I wonder if he knows he is all I think about at night
He is the reason for the tear drops on my guitar
He is the only thing that makes me wishing on a wishing star
He is the song in the car I keep singing don’t know why I do.
I always hated waiting. Waiting is the worst thing because we will never know what might happen next but I have fallen for him so much that waiting is something I whole heartedly accept. There is something good in this pain. The ‘love pain’ is a good kind of pain. Even though, it leaves us scarred, it’s a brave thing to be in love.
Let me talk about the good things I feel when I am around him. I laugh so much at his jokes. He makes me forget the things around me. I look at him with a hope that he won’t ever decide to vanish from my life. It feels good to make him smile whenever he is down. May be, love isn’t just hormones talking. Love is something more.
So here’s to all those couples, who are in love, I salute. They are brave enough to accept it. They are courageous enough to fight for it. May be being in love is not such a bad thing.
My few minutes are up. The battle once again begins.
My advice to you is don’t anticipate for Valentine’s day. It’s a bad thing to be in love. Don’t fall in the love trap.